week 2; tuesday ( stephanie )

[axilium]

[there's no escape, steph. literally. steph can't escape unless her leg has been magically healed between then and now.

belph is not happy.]

What.

Are you doing?

Comments

[vigilantics]

[ unfortunately, ion did not sacrifice his leg for hers, so stephanie definitely cannot escape.

the plan worked in theory; varian was determined to go into the woods no matter how many times steph told him no and that it was too dangerous. she agreed to come along just so she would be able to force him to leave at the first sign of danger, but of course... the woods were magic.

she's not sure how to say any of that in a way that doesn't sound like a pathetic excuse. ]

Sorry.

[axilium]

[...]

It's Hikage who deserves an apology, not me. I take it you've already said the same to him?

[vigilantics]

[ she nods her head. for whatever reason, she seems mostly focused on belph's eyes than anything else, but she'll keep glancing away. ]

Mm. Still. Sorry.

[axilium]

[he sighs.]

... Just try not to die. You need to make it through this, Steph.

[vigilantics]

I'm starting to think that I don't. I can't even look after one kid without screwing it up.

[axilium]

[...

it's difficult to hear steph talk like this. not necessarily surprising, but...]

C'mon. Has anyone managed to keep a leash on Varian? He's old enough that you aren't responsible for his safety.

[vigilantics]

I couldn't let him just go on his own.

[ it's said quietly. and she knows how dumb it is to be so concerned about the safety of someone who isn't your partner, but she can't help it. ]

You got stuck with a moron.

[axilium]

That still makes it his own fault, not yours. On the other hand, [his tone gets dry,] your injuries are totally your own fault.

[there are so many things he could say, but he won't.]

Yeah. It's not so bad sometimes, but right now is a different story.

[vigilantics]

[ she has to look away at that. god, they were right, she really isn't any good at this. ]

I know.

[axilium]

[ugh. he doesn't know what to say. elcia would just snark at him, so steph's... acceptance of it all is new.]

... What's this about, Steph?

[vigilantics]

[ she almost says "nothing" but then she doesn't. there's a moment of silence as she just... deliberates.

and then she's on a tangent. ]

Do you ever decide that there is one thing you want to do? But then everyone and their butler tell you that, no, you're terrible at it and you need to quit and go away forever? But you're like, "No way! You're not the boss of me!" and keep doing it but then you mess up sometimes, and those mess ups range from "eh, that's not that bad" to "whoops I'm dead," and then when you finally figure things out and people start to respect you, you end up in a murder castle and just screw up all over again?

[ she... started wheezing towards the end there, because that is too many words said in such rapid succession while she is in a lot of pain. ]

[axilium]

[belph cannot, in fact, say he knows what that's like. he waits for a few moments, before—]

Whoa there. Try not to suffocate yourself.

[...]

That... sounds like a lot?

[vigilantics]

I'm such an idiot.

[ it's said more to herself than to him. she sounds mad. ]

You should probably smack me.

[axilium]

Considering how hard your head probably is, I'd just hurt my hand.

[vigilantics]

Oh no. Not your hand.

[ she rubs at her eyes. ]

Sorry. This is getting into tragic backstory territory.

[axilium]

It's fine.

... For what it's worth, regardless of whether or not you suck at it, I think it's good to have something you want to do. Life's pretty dull without dreams.

[vigilantics]

You can say nice things.

[ it's said with a small laugh. ]

I want... to give hope. That even when things seem grim, and impossible, that there's a chance that it'll change. Like when you feel like you're suffocating, but one small thing makes you smile despite it? And that thing helps you get up and keep moving. I want to help spread that.

[axilium]

I have my moments.

[...

something flickers across his face. pain? it disappears too quickly to say for certain. again, there are so many things he could say. something that might make her feel better. in the end, though, it's too personal.

so, he settles for,]

Just keep on being your cheerful idiot self, then—preferably without any more broken bones.

[vigilantics]

I, apparently, cannot make any promises there.

[ as she has proven today.

but then she holds her hand out. ]

Give me your hand.

[axilium]

... Uh, what for?

[vigilantics]

I'm going to break it.

[ she's still waiting expectantly. ]

[axilium]

Ouch!

[but sure, he'll give it.]

[vigilantics]

[ she'll take his hand and... make him gently smack her own hand. ]

There. You smacked me.

[axilium]

[a beat.]

I have no words to express how utterly unnecessary that was, but okay.

[vigilantics]

Please humor me. My leg is broken and I got stabbed with my own grappling hook.

[ whoops. ]